Saturday, April 26, 2008

I scrimmaged! Holy crap!

I’m elated. You have no idea.

I scrimmaged, and I didn’t fall apart, I didn’t break my neck, I didn’t break anyone else’s neck, and I also did the following:

-had no trouble at all keeping up with the pack. This was my main goal and I accomplished it. Hooray!
-didn’t get one penalty. Granted, I wasn’t terribly aggressive, but still, no penalties!
-I tried every blocking position and did something successful in each one, even if it was a small success.
-I had a great moment when my brain made my body go in for a hit before I said to myself "there is the jammer, I should hit her now". Granted, I missed, but it was like that first moment in Spanish class when I thought "mantequilla" instead of "butter in Spanish is... mantequilla". Does that make sense?

Plus, I can’t even say how much it meant to me when people told me I didwellafterwards. I was in tears by the time we started stretching because I was so happy. I feel like such a sap, but I freely admit that I totally burst into crazy "I’m so happy" sobs when I got home and told Steve all about it. It just feels sogoodto finally be able to play.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Must... find... silver... lining....

Weak people give up. I am not a weak person, therefore I will take pleasure in the following positive aspects of not being able to skate right now:

1. I can spend more time working out my arms, which have gone all small and wussy since trading weight-lifting time for roller derby time.
2. I can go to scrimmages and watch so I can keep learning. Being more of a visual learner than a kinesthetic learner, this will only help me in the long run.
3. Favoring my left leg for a while will help it get stronger, and since that's the one that gets tired all the time (yay skating counter-clockwise!), this is helpful anyway.
4. Since breaking my tailbone, I never expected to bout this season anyway, so only missing out on scrimmages right now. These take place every weekend, so there will be plenty more waiting for me when I get better again.

So while I feel like I'm trying to stand up in pounding surf (being knocked down by wave, after wave, after wave just as I get to my feet), I'll get to my goddamned feet if I keep at it. I figure I'll just have really strong quads after getting up from falling down so many times.

Sunday, April 20, 2008

"You've got to find the person holding the voodoo doll, really." - Mrs. Dash

Tonight's scrimmage was filled with both good and bad things. The good:

1. I hit the opposing jammer a few times. I also made the attempt a few more times, but missed. This is a vast improvement on last week's scrimmage where I only tried to hit someone once. Hooray!
2. I booty blocked members of the opposing team a few times. I didn't hold them for very long, but I consciously said "get in her way!" and did so. HUGE improvement over last week, when I know I had the opposing jammer behind me, but didn't do much about it. Hooray again!
3. We only had nine people on our team, so I skated in about half of the jams. It was exhausting as hell, but it was great to have so many chances to improve on the jam before. Triple hooray!

The bad:

1. I gave the single worst whip of my life that resulted in both my left arm and my team's jammer getting sandwiched in between roughly half of the opposing team. That was pretty cringe-worthy, and it hurt like a bitch.
2. I took my first trip to the box. However, that's not too bad, because it means I was playing more aggressively. I suppose this could fall under "good" too...
3. I took a fall during which my legstriedto do the right thing (fall on my knees) but I slipped on something and my right leg went in two directions at once. Something popped in my knee. I don't know how bad it is, but I couldn't really walk well on it. Yes, I will be going to the doctor tomorrow.

So, while I'm proud of what I did, I'm really concerned about my knee. I know that the "pop" I felt was serious - I've sprained my ankle enough times to know a sprain when I feel one. I wouldn't be half so concerned if this were an isolated incident.... this is the knee with really bad tendonitis. Since coming back from breaking my tailbone, it's been grinding really badly, and over the past three weeks it's felt "loose". I'm really worried that this was coming, with or without the fall.

I just hope I'll be off skates for, say, a few weeks to a month or two. I think it's a possibility that I'm looking at more time than that, and I'll be so upset if that's the case....

Dash was right. I really do need to find (and take out) the person holding the little Dread voodoo doll before he or she does me some serious damage. I just want to play roller derby, godammit. I'll wait as long as I have to, but this injury crap is really starting to piss me off.

In summation, this is how I feel today, with God/Zeus/Odin/whatever as the pidgeon and the sad little boy as me: